Divorcing: Before You Tell Your Spouse

Posted on: 4 June 2018

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In a bad marriage, you may have been wanting to divorce for some time now. You and your spouse have likely threatened divorce at least once, and you might finally be prepared to file. However, before you break this final news to your spouse, you should protect yourself by getting the following done beforehand.

Seek Therapy

If you've been relying on your own feelings and the thoughts of your friends, it's possible that a professional counselor is necessary. A professional can get beyond your feelings of anger and frustration with your current marriage to examine the root of any issues you're dealing with. They can also serve as a vital partner for handling your feelings about your spouse in a way that isn't destructive to your divorce case or your own personal life. As you take each step in the divorce, they can keep you from focusing on the wrong things and keep you calm and grounded. In rare cases, they may even make you see that you really don't want a divorce at all, and can help you find your way back to a productive union with your spouse.

Plan Finances

A divorce can very often prove disruptive to your bank account. If you expect that you'll be paying support money for children or alimony payments, this can mean a big hit to your wallet. Even if you expect to be on the receiving end of those monies, your expenses could be much higher than they were during marriage.

It's sometimes impossible to know exactly what money you will be granted or need to pay as part of a divorce settlement, but it's absolutely important to grapple with those issues now. Can you get another job? Where can you cut living costs? Do you need to search out smaller living spaces? Avoid being surprised by a dramatic shift in financial status because of your marriage dissolution.

Look to the Future

Years ago, you might have expected that your marriage would last forever. Knowing it won't can create apprehension about your future. Therefore, give yourself things to be happy about in the days to follow. If your spouse dislikes the theater, for instance, get yourself a ticket to the hottest shows of the season. Plan a trip. See the world. Find things to get excited about in the future on your own.

These pointers provide the preparation you need before you tell your spouse that the marriage is finally over. Getting an attorney, like Gomez May LLP, will also allow you to avoid legal and personal missteps during this process